That Different Light...

I've come to find in these past few months that no matter what happens, there will always be something to look forward to. I have so much to look forward to.
I have so many plans.
I'm going to start living them.

It's all a process...
I'm growing. I'm learning. I'm healing.

I imagined and hoped for so many new experiences at the start of this school year. Three months later and I don't want to say that I'm disappointed, but more untouched. Passed by.
Then again... it's only been three months.
Then again... I shouldn't be complaining.
Life is good.
Unexpected things are thrown our way and we have to "roll with the punches".

I've found that all us adolescent youngster-teenagers all feel as if these rough patches we go through are the end of the world. When really... it's only the beginning.
We have so much time ahead of us to worry about this stuff.
A year, two years from now... everything will be different. Who you are now will have faded away. Non-existent in this universe.

So why do we act as if this is it? A dyer tragedy every time?
Perhaps our hearts are still new and tender? Perhaps our minds are still growing and gaining knowledge?

I suppose we must try to look at everything in a different light...
I guess if a heartbreak occurs, you are one heartbreak less than you were to your soon to be true love.
If things are said or done... it'll soon be overwith and over.
Tomorrow is a new day. Don't waste it with remorse or regret.

I suppose I may be that kettle calling that pot black, but I'm learning just as you are. My heart is strengthening just as yours is. But mostly, I'm trying to see things in another light just as I hope you are...

You are beautiful. You are worth it. You can do it.
You've got the world ahead of you.
I not only say these words to all of you... but to myself as well.
We all need to hear it sometimes.
Life is good... beautiful, magnificent, divine... idyllic in it's own perfect way despite the shadows that tend to follow behind...
Keep the light in, and those shadows will never hurt you.

Tomorrow is a new day... I hope it's a bright one.

It's been quite awhile since my last post...
To be completely honest, I have had numerous attempts these past weeks to come up with a plausible meaning filled point to make, or something to address, or even something to vent.
All have sorta kinda sucked.
Writer's block perhaps?
I haven't written a song in weeks.
I suppose it's true... All the inspiration I once had moved away... somewhat faded away with distance and miles.

Everything is just different. My friends. School. My heart. Life.

As much as I would like to continue on with a "well whatever... it's all good", I don't really have much more to say...

Maybe I'll try again later.

This place is barren and dry... as are my words.
I can't seem to sum up anything consisting of warmth or happiness or light.
Nothing.

I'm praying for the rain. For a difference. For a change.

"Blessed are they who see beautiful things in humble places

where other people see nothing..."

-Camille Pissarro

I'm Singing, Healthy, and Happy...

Life is good right now...
I'm healthy. I'm singing. I'm happy.
I have a bunch of beautiful new and old people in my life.
I get to sing every single day.
I have people who look up to me.
I have a lot of love and faith right now.

Of course there's the occasional disagreement, annoyance, stress, temper... but hey! I'm only human!
The one thing I always have to say to myself is that whatever it is, won't last forever which means it musn't be that big of a deal.
Let it go.
Move on.
Untouched and strong.
Kill with kindness.

I'm singing every single day in and out of school.
I'm into this whole fitness/healthy lifestyle thing.
I'm  learning every day about people and places.
I'm learning every day about the beauty of life...
Not only learning, but living.

I'm a very lucky girl.
Very lucky indeed.

Like fire and rain...

We are beseeched fire.

We are granted rain.

We fill voids and breaks with certainty.

A certainty that comes from within the depths of the soul.

It's said to never run out...

I sure hope it never does.

Kendall...

So there are few people on this planet who I adore infinitely...
Kendall is one of them.
I didn't know a human being could be so sweet and so supportive
and as fun as she is.
She never fails to make my day. She makes me feel appreciated. She is so lovely.
She will read this... She always does.

Kendall... You are so special. I've known you for such a short time, and I already consider you an irreplaceable part of my life.
Thank you for your kindness. Your jokes. Your smiles. Your love...
I promise you it will always be returned...
I love you beautiful. xoxo

Knock Knock...

So much is changing in so many good ways.
I feel like a different person.

A door will never stop knocking. Your door will never be vacant. There may be times of hardships that pass in between those light knocks, but they won't last forever.
Some opportunity, or some smile, or handshake, or even love will always make it's way up your path to your door.
Things have changed. I used to be afraid of it. I used to rebel against it.
Now I welcome it.
It's all I can do.
It's all I really ever needed.
It's the most rewarding and beautiful feeling when you conquer the things that have weighed you down for so long.
I feel like nothing can ever really get that bad...

I am truly blessed.
I am so thankful.

My door will never be vacant. I won't let it.

...knock knock